For Better or Worse: Why Hiring a Nanny Could Save Your Marriage
When you first meet someone and are in the beginning stages of dating, that person is all you can think about! Your emotions are heightened, you can’t keep your hands off of each other, and you just want to be around each other ALL the time. Even if you’re not doing anything; you’d rather do nothing together than to do nothing alone… those are the strong feelings you have for each other in the beginning stages of dating because everything is so new and exciting.
If the love is real, you’ll still have those same strong feelings for each other but the intensity might be toned down just a bit because you’ve gotten to know each other better and learned each other’s ways… but the feelings remain the same, even on into marriage. Now, the true test of love comes after you have a baby.
After you have a baby, life as you knew it will never be the same. As new parents, your main focus is taking care of the baby, leaving you so tired and overwhelmed that you barely take care of yourself, let alone your partner… Once you realize this, it makes you wonder where did the love go? After all, the love you have for each other is what brought the baby in the first place, so did the love leave when the baby came? Is your marriage falling apart because of the baby?
Why Hiring a Nanny is the Best Thing You Could Ever Do For Your Marriage
If your marriage is in a suffrage period where the new baby has taken over your marriage, leaving you no time to tend to each other as a couple, it might be time for you to consider calculating the costs of hiring a nanny. Now, as new parents, hiring a nanny might be a terrifying thought because you don’t want someone you don’t know watching your baby (and understandably so) but that’s why you conduct interviews and really get to know the nanny applicants before hiring them. You’ll also want to do a background check on your top applicants.
The simple thought of hiring a nanny can give you major anxiety but before you have a panic attack, stop and think about all of the ways that hiring a nanny can benefit your marriage. To be quite honest, the first few years of your marriage is going to be your toughest years and that’s without a baby so to add a baby in the mix of that.
You’re going to need to rely on each other heavily in order to make your marriage stand the tests of time. You don’t have to hire the nanny full-time either… your nanny can you out only a couple days out of the week if you want. Take a look at the top reasons why a nanny just might be the saving grace for your marriage.
You Feel Resentful Towards Your Partner
Resentment is something that one spouse feels towards the other spouse because they feel like the household workload isn’t equal. Whether it’s the mother who stays home and takes care of the baby and the household chores of cleaning and cooking while the husband goes out to work or vice versa, it’s all about give and take.
In fact, parents.com states that resentment is one of the biggest marriage issues a couple will face after having a baby. Well, what if resentment didn’t have to be one of those issues? What if some of the responsibilities each parent has could be delegated to the nanny? That would not only give each spouse time to themselves but it would also give each spouse time to spend with each other.
You Feel Guilty About Time Spent (or the Lack of)
If you’re the spouse who spends the majority of the time tending to the baby, you might have feelings of guilt for not making time to spend with your spouse. If your the spouse who goes out to work every day, you may feel guilty about not being able to spend as much time at home sharing responsibilities for the baby.
For the at-home spouse, it’s almost as though your mind is so filled with to-do lists and planning that nothing else matters. For the spouse that feels like they don’t do enough, ding more isn’t really going to help the situation. The solution is knowing when to ask for help and there’s nothing wrong with it. A nanny will be able to alleviate any type of stress that you and your spouse may have and leave room for more of the important things like each other.
You Need Time to Yourself
Both you and your spouse were individual people before kids and before marriage and sometimes you just need to get back to that person. Whether it’s going golfing for a few hours or going to a couple of Zumba classes throughout the week, do what makes you happy because if you don’t your marriage will quickly be on its way to divorce and that’s not what the result of having a child should be.